


iTunes Drabbles challenge (collection of 14 drabbles)

by songsaboutdrowning



Category: Florabella - Fandom, Florence + the Machine
Genre: Angst, Drabblathon, Drabble Collection, F/F, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Lover to lover, challenge, iTunes Challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-25
Updated: 2016-09-25
Packaged: 2018-08-17 06:31:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8133796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/songsaboutdrowning/pseuds/songsaboutdrowning
Summary: Originally posted in May 2013 @ songsaboutdrowning on tumblr, the challenge is to put iTunes on shuffle and only write for the duration of the song so all of these were written in 3-5 minutes each.





	1. Day 1: Dear Rosemary – Foo Fighters // D’yer Mak’er – Led Zeppelin

**Author's Note:**

> Rules:  
> 1\. Pick your favorite fandom  
> 2\. Put iTunes on shuffle  
> 3\. Write a drabble for the first ten (sixteen) songs.  
> 4\. You can only write for the duration of the song.
> 
> All these drabbles were written in one session and then posted over the course of a week, two a day.

**1\. Dear Rosemary – Foo Fighters**

People say I’m the one who went away. I’m the one who went after a different life, in a different country, with a different career. They have no idea what came before that – no idea what led me to that decision. You let me get so close and then you took it all away.

I had to watch you rekindle things with boyfriends, had to be silent as I listened to my heart break while everyone ignored me. The cameras were only ever pointed towards Florence Welch, who cares about the small blonde in the corner, who even is she?

You can go on and on about how I’m your constant but maybe I just spoiled you, so I took myself out of the equation. Even if you say you love me, Florence, you’re still putting me last. I will always love you, but I had to leave. You left me first anyway.

**2\. D’yer Mak’er – Led Zeppelin**

[note to self – well this is a nice segue…]

I just had to watch you go, and I couldn’t do anything. I wanted to say “please don’t go” but the words choked up in my throat and I guess it came across like I didn’t care, but when I opened that envelope something snapped. A piece fell out of the puzzle. It was swept under a rug. It was kicked by many unknowing feet in the street, under parked cars and into gutters and I know I will never find that piece again and it’s my fault I lost it.

You wrote me a letter. You said you never felt as unimportant as when we were together. I wish I could tell you how I feel your presence in my breathing, I cannot think of a time when your name is not echoing in my brain. You’re always there.

You couldn’t even tell me to my face you were moving away. First I had to find out from Twitter and then you wrote it in a letter. I feel like I should run after you, but nothing I ever say will make you believe me, and my legs are frozen in place, so you just go.


	2. Day 2: It wasn’t me – Anouk // Nativity – Zola Jesus

**3\. It wasn’t me – Anouk**

It surprises me that people still haven’t found out about this. The deep dark secret from Florence’s past. I’m everywhere now, I’m sure you’ve seen it. You’ve seen my face on a magazine cover, on tv, maybe a poster in the tube? I’m surprised you’ve kept your mouth shut about the way you controlled me for over a year.

I only really just realised it when we played our first big festival, that I was free from you. The songs I wrote about you were the juvenile, angry ones that didn’t make the cut for BBC Introducing. Does it hurt to know you could have played a part in Florence + the Machine history and instead you’re just a distant memory no one talks about? The abusive boyfriend who never had a kind word and never showed any support, only scorn and teasing.

It took meeting a girl half my size to realise my real worth.

**4\. Nativity – Zola Jesus**

I swear I can touch the sweat in this club, all these droplets of body heat that swarm around me, the stench of humanity and alcohol and frailty. Only melted ice left in my glass, but I’m still holding it as my hair is plastered to the back of my neck and I can’t find you. I know you’re here somewhere, but my neck only seems to be able to tilt upwards with a sense of freedom and liberation that makes me want to scream and drown in the music (I’m naturally loud, though. Perhaps people would hear me even over these blaring speakers). I would have to look down to look for you. I’d have to look for the brightest, blondest hair in this crowd.

But I know you’re here somewhere and that’s enough.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That first one was really difficult and I know the actual song doesn’t refer to a boyfriend at all, but it was just very hard to adapt to what we know and it pained me a little to have to invent that situation, because I’m a stickler for canon really. I almost feel like I should apologise.


	3. Day 3: Hands Held High – Linkin Park // Light in your eyes - Sheryl Crow

**5\. Hands Held High – Linkin Park**

Every day a new article that tells me the world isn’t moving forward at all. That people like me are still stoned to death and afraid of walking out in the streets, at school, or maybe they’re at danger in their own homes – what right do I have to flaunt my happiness when there’s still so much wrong out there?

Or maybe I can show that I found my happiness in another girl and I’m not ashamed of it. Everyone’s free to bombard me with flashes and “over here, Florence” as I’m walking hand in hand with her down a red carpet or if I decide to kiss her in a club.

**6\. Light in your eyes – Sheryl Crow**

A muggy American morning, running in my pyjama top and leggings. You run after me with your phone in your hand and snap a photo of me, posing, of course, in the middle of fucking nowhere. Times like these, I forget who I am. We’re playing a show in an arena tonight? Are we, really? I feel like a child, playing in the back garden with her best friend, making up fantasy worlds, dressing up with whatever’s within reach, when laughter came so naturally and problems were easily fixed with a cookie or a soft toy. You make me feel like that, still. Time stops, and I’m the most insignificant nobody on this street and I can still laugh because I’m watching chickens, or teasing you about your height.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, ngl I did have a “5b” in there but I dare even the most dedicated Florabella writer to get some inspiration from a rap duel between Korn and Limp Bizkit (people make so many assumptions about the music I listen to, I reckon that one’ll come as a shock…)


	4. Day 4:  One way ticket to hell and back – The Darkness // Wash my hands – Meredith Brooks

**7\. One way ticket to hell and back – The Darkness**

I said once that mushroom-me is exactly the same as normal me. But cocaine-me is not. And that’s why I’ve never really let the people closest to me see that person. It happened a lot around the time Stuart and I broke up the first time. I found a whole new crowd to party with, people whose judgment I didn’t care about. They could see me at my worst and it was fine, because I didn’t give a shit – now, imagine if Isa or Rob or Chris had seen me in that state, that would have been different.

It just so happened that one night, as I was getting home at four in the morning, with more holes in my tights than stars in the sky, I found Isa sitting on my front step, one eyebrow raised. All she had for me were four words: _this needs to stop._

**8\. Wash my hands – Meredith Brooks**

I wonder if it’s weird that I’m most at ease in and around water. I’m not even a water sign. I feel like it’s the only place where I can admit big truths to myself, and the big truths are: I live for the past way too much, I’m scared of the future, scared of making plans. My life is lived day by day because I can’t look any further, but looking back is an addiction instead. I want to forget my mistakes like it was someone else who made them. I see them as the steps that brought me here and made me who I am, but why can’t I let go of them? Every droplet from the shower, every bubble in my bath, is a mistake I’ve made and been unable to let go.

This will never change. I will never change. Every shower, every bath, every amplified breath and sigh and sob and heartbeat that I feel within my body, is me promising that I have to cut myself some slack, that I have to overthink less, and then I come out and dry myself off and I go back to being the absolute wreck that I always am.

It’s no wonder I love water so much. It just seems to make me forget who I am. Forget all the screw-ups and find respite, for a few brief moments, that my mistakes do not define who I am.


	5. Day 5: Sweet Jane - Velvet Underground // Angie - Rolling Stones

**9\. Sweet Jane – Velvet Underground**

If you told me 10 years ago that I’d be a member of a world famous band, I wouldn’t have believed you. I was making beats in a basement and worked as a runner just to make a living. Then one fine day, she sang for me. And she reminded me of other times. Times when life wasn’t so rushed and people wanted girls to be teases: prudes in the public eye and animals in the bedroom. And she was the complete opposite. She was most naked when she was singing to me. She was raw and pure and she showed me so many things just through her voice. She showed what we could do, together, if we put our minds to it. She showed me that you can make your own life and be yourself. She showed me the light.

**10\. Angie – Rolling Stones**

When we’re 50 and everyone’s forgotten about us, and they ask us to do a reunion tour just to appeal to the few unfortunate souls who dedicated their lives to us back then,

when that happens, there is nothing that will take away the image of the smile on your face,

and hell, even your tears.

We held each other every day like there was no tomorrow.

Even at the pinnacle of our fame,

at night we were just two scared girls in a bed.

We didn’t really speak much;

our hands did most of the talking.

I don’t… quite know where you are now,

but when I said I would love you forever, I meant it. With a certainty

stronger than I’m certain of my own name.

And some feelings never die, and some memories never die.

And if I was still making music right now, it would be about you.

It dried up, somehow. It went away until we had nothing to say to each other anymore.

But of course I still love you. Of course you will always be a part of me.

Of course you’re my life, Isa, of course you’re my life.

You remind me of the only time in my life when being alive actually meant something.


	6. Day 6: One step closer - Linkin Park // Lover to lover – Florence + the Machine

 

**11\. One step closer – Linkin Park**

Sometimes I get these phases. I get really intolerant of you, and I feel like shit, because you’re supposed to be my best friend. But sometimes I want to push you away because the alternative is, well – the alternative is to pull you close to me and grab your wrist so hard it will hurt, and tell you that I want you, and that every little thing you do is a distraction that makes me feel like I’m on the edge of a cliff.

I don’t like this cocktail of negative feelings one bit. It’s not me. I’m the “girl of action and positivity”, remember? Perhaps it’s best if I disappear for a while.

**12\. Lover to lover – Florence + the Machine**

No one will ever know the special meaning this song has to me. To us, really. Yeah, some people may have guessed, because when Rusty starts playing, I can’t help but look at you and smile. It’s like a game. It’s our own, little, private game.

I said I wrote this song from a man’s point of view, or as close as possible as I imagine it to be. That’s… not a lie, but it’s a partial truth to say the least. I wrote it to trace all the steps that led me to you. I wrote it to remind myself that it doesn’t matter how many albums you sell, you could still be rejected. You’re still vulnerable. You still go through one too many people before you find the right one.

But now I’ve found you… I just cannot be contained. It’s a sense of elation but also of falling down a rabbit hole, and that’s alright. I’m embracing it. I am perfectly happy with living life like a whirlwind because the important thing is that you’re there. You’re there with your little smirk, you’re there with your little Fanta can as I spin around on stage and sing my liberation.

It’s alright. Everything’s alright. They’ll never know why.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys have no idea how happy I was when Lover to Lover came on. It was obviously the easiest one to write. You’re supposed to write for the duration of the song, but I finished that one with 38 seconds to spare :)


	7. Day 7: The Change - Evanescence // Sign your name - Sheryl Crow (feat. Justin Timberlake)

**13\. The Change – Evanescence**

I can’t really tell when everything started going wrong. I can’t really tell how you can need someone so bad and also want to push them away, and I can’t really tell how I’m an adult and I still don’t know which of the two solutions is preferable. All I know is that I feel like I’m invisible, like no one cares about my struggles. I feel like I’m just an accessory. Oh sure, Isabella’s got plenty of friends, plenty of ventures, but the truth is, Isabella needs love just as much as the next girl. And sometimes, Isabella feels fucking weak. And you can see that something’s wrong, of course you can – but you choose not to do anything about it, and that’s not something I would expect from you.

I said something I regretted immediately – I said “You’ve changed!” and… you know… everyone changes. Why am I even surprised? I met you ten years ago, you were barely an adult. I liked being needed. But now, you’ve come into your own and you shine of your own light and you don’t need _me_ to feel like a whole person. And it hurts. You’ve become independent, and I’m the needy one now. You tell me you love me a hundred times a day and sometimes I still want more… but I don’t know what.

**14\. Sign your name – Sheryl Crow**

This is the most clichéd situation on earth. Girl in love with her best friend, can’t say anything for fear of ruining things. I don’t think you want to know how many times I’ve imagined you naked. I do things to myself imagining it’s you I’m touching, and I feel like I’m in such a downward spiral I cannot get out of. I guess it’s different to fantasise about a girl than a guy, because what guy would spend absolute ages teasing you with just the tip of a finger until you’re reduced to begging? When I close my eyes I always see a room with the feeble light of either dusk or dawn, or sometimes I see my own bed back home and a rainy day outside, I see the traffic of London go on, mindless, unaware that the two of us are laying without clothes in my makeshift bed and I feel the texture of your skin under my fingers and I feel your heavy breathing in my ear and I feel like… _this is me, I’m doing this_. I know the sound of your voice but I want to hear your sighs. I want nothing else than for you to be my girlfriend. And yes, I know it’s corny, but I want some Justin Timberlake playing in the background when I see you come for the very first time and I finally find out if you look like I’ve been imagining you in my dreams for all these weeks and months and years.  


End file.
